90 Day Fiance The Other Way Recap: The Great Unknown

karine divorce 90dftow

What the frick is happening on 90 Day Fiance The Other Way right now?! Are we in the Upside Down? People are suddenly pregnant. I’m starting to sympathize with Aladin. Paul is riding on boats BY HIMSELF. Next week, it looks like we find out something very, very bad about Sumit. My god! It’s like we’ve spent too long in the trash heap and were starting to get used to the smell, only to have fresh garbage dumped on our heads. Ahhhhh. Take a deep breath and let’s dive in…

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Corey & Evelin 

If we thought Corey was a pathetic mess last week, it’s only because we hadn’t seen this week’s footage yet. Dayum! This dude needs to pack his sh*t and get back to the family compound in time for Taco Tuesday. 

Instead, he sleeps in a hammock. Why? BECAUSE EVELIN LOCKED HIM OUT OF HIS OWN HOUSE. Yes, after their fight, our boy is legit bunking with street pigs while Evelin pouts inside of the apartment that Corey’s entire savings paid for. I can’t with this guy. I CANNOT. 

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After he’s allowed back indoors, Corey begs Evelin or forgiveness, which she reluctantly gives him. Umm…what about her statement that her ex has been in her life before Corey and will be afterward too? What about the entire town calling Corey the Punk Who Gets Cheated On And Sprouts Horns? What about the “fling” with Raul that Evelin never even bothered to tell Corey as a heads up? What about her not wanting to wear her ring? WHAT ABOUT HER BEING A HIDEOUS MONSTER WHO’S SUCKING THE LIFE FORCE OUT OF COREY RIGHT AFTER HIS TRAUMATIC VACCINATIONS?!?!? Sigh. 

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Apparently, we will never get explanations on any of this because Corey doesn’t care. He only requests that Evelin block her ex on social media going forward. To everyone’s shock, she agrees. If only to keep the money rolling in. 

Deavan & Jihoon

Not much to report on this front, except that Deavan leaves for South Korea with precious baby Taeyang in tow, hoping that Jihoon found work/housing/baby wipes/sustenance in time for their arrival. Umm, this outlook is Not Likely

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For the next two weeks, Drascilla will be left behind with Deavan’s parents in order to save South Korea from a Godzilla III experience in which the entire populace runs screaming into the ocean. KIDDING! <not kidding> Mom, Dad, and Drascilla will fly out to be with the whole Hamily soon! It’s all good. 

Laura & Aladin 

Okay, you guys – the space-time continuum on this show has apparently gone through a wormhole because this week we find out that Laura has been in Qatar for months, not weeks, and is mere days away from her 3-day wedding to Aladin. Whaaaaaaaah?

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In a last ditch effort to persuade Liam to come to her big day(s), Laura Skypes him from an internet cafe and lays on the mom guilt. Without much of a fight, Liam basically shrugs and agrees to come. But if sh*t goes sideways (and we know it will), he warns mom that he will NOT be holding back. Oh boy. I cannot wait for this. RELEASE THE LIAM! 

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Before the big event, Aladin and Laura fly back to his hometown in Tunisia, where we meet his totally charming, sweet family. They are still reeling from the sudden death of Aladin’s sister last year, which Aladin says rocked their entire world. He’s the youngest of five brothers, loves doting on his baby nieces and nephews, and just wants his family to have three days of joy in the midst of a terrible time. 

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Laura, who was with Aladin and his family during the aftermath of the car accident that claimed his sister’s life, shares a lasting bond with everyone – but she’s still bummed out to see how much Aladin lights up when he sees his brother’s babies. She knows he wants one of his own. Yo, Laura! Here’s what you do: Call up our homegirl Angela and ask her about the finer points of egg totin’.  #SurrogacyExplainedByHalfwits 

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Until the wedding, Laura won’t be getting any jiggy-jiggy, as learn when Aladin unceremoniously drags a mattress into their nuptial suite and announces that Mama is their new bunkie! Whelp. Sweet dreams, lovebirds.

Tiffany & Ronald

As many of us know from social media spoiler posts, Tiffany got pregnant with Ronald’s baby within, like, three seconds of marrying him. It was basically Jail-Rehab-Wedding-Pregnancy. Just a totally normal sequence of events.  

tiffany ronald 90dftow

This week, she’s ready to announce the happy news to her mom via Skype. Except mom ain’t happy – she’s super pissed! Especially because Tiffany wants to birth the baby in South Africa to ensure Ronald, the felon who can’t travel anywhere, can be there. 

tiffany mom 90dftow

Despite her initial response of “What the f**k, Tiff!” mom comes around quickly when she sees how thrilled Daniel is. When Tiffany and Ronald tell him he’ll be a big brother, he lights up like fireworks and makes everyone feel like celebrating. Seriously, this kid is THE BEST. (Please keep him safe!!!!!) 

daniel tiffany ronald 90dftow

*Also, Tiffany and Ronald go to the doctor for an ultrasound and everything is fine. THE END.

Paul & Karine 

After Paul’s scary meltdown and their endless bickering, Karine actually followed through on her plan! Dude, she straight up ditched Paul with his 47 duffel bags and went back to Manaus with Mom. HOLY SMOKES. 

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When Paul finds out he’s been thusly abandoned, he’s in shock. Hmm. What’s a psychotic nutjob supposed to do now? Well, he can drag his thousand-pound luggage back on that slow boat to Manaus and bathe in raw feces for the next three days. But damn if our boy Paul isn’t acting like this mission to snatch and grab his runaway woman is some sort of vacation.

Photo evidence of Paul chillin on the sewage barge like it’s a Disney Cruise:

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Paul reminds us that Karine has been texting with men and he doesn’t like it. Despite the trillions of STD/Pregnancy tests he forced her to take back when they were dating, he still doesn’t trust that she’s not cheating on him. And he wants that DNA test. What he doesn’t want to do is 1) Learn the language, and 2) Get an actual job. 

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Karine has seemed to finally realize who she’s dealing with, and she’s reached her limit. And when she reluctantly meets up with Paul to “make amends” in Manaus, it becomes clear that he’s still fixated on Karine being a cheater/user, while ignoring his part in making their lives totally stressful. 

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Very exhausted and very pregnant, Karine flatly tells him, “I see that you’re a jerk and that you won’t change.” 

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Derailed in his attempt to pin the entire mess on Karine (again), Paul chases her back to the apartment, where she further rebuffs him. So he resorts to literally speaking like a human translator app: “You talk? I talk you? We love? You want divorce? I drink poop water now okay sorry? I go now. Karine hate Paul? Why hate? Me kiss!” 

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Essentially, their marriage is a rancid mess stuffed in a dumpster and sprinkled with acid rain. Also, can we take a moment to ponder the actual mess in the photo above? I swear, the physical state of Paul and Karine’s dwellings is a clear metaphor for their garbage relationship. I mean, I feel like I’m getting scabies just looking at it. <scratches leg…flinches>

(Photo Credit TLC)

Will Karine stick her her guns? Should Tiffany give birth in South Africa? Is Corey a world class idiot, or just in love? Comment below!

Check out my recaps of 90 Day Fiance, Love After Lockup, Real Housewives – and more! – on my podcast, Pink Shade With Erin Martin (iTunes, Stitcher, Google Play, Spotify, Castbox, Acast). And join my Pink Shade Facebook Group to dish about reality TV all week long! Follow me on Instagram @erinleahmartin and on Twitter @ErinLeahMartin

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